Future Phone Calls
by Jesus.Lives
Summary: Lightning calls Jo only to find out that she's been with Brick. Jealous banter ensues. Continuation of future-set phone calls between Jo and Lightning.
1. Gone Pro

_A/N; Well, that's officially ALL my ships that they've ruined this season. Except Scourtney but that accidental kiss was LAME. But I wanted to do this other little drabble thing for Banette when I was speculating on the future for our OTP Joning. It'd be cute if Jo was waiting for Lightning when he was playing pro games and stuff. So yes, I wrote this. It's short.  
_

_Summary: Jo calls Lightning post one of his pro-games to rub in his televised fumble. Future fic for Banette.  
_

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_****__**Future**_ Phone Calls  


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"Sha-Lightning," Lightning picked up the phone in his signature way despite feeling more sombre than usual. He should be gloating but just hours earlier he dropped the ball... quite literally and on national television.

"Hey sha-Jazz-Hands, caught your game today."

"Oh hey Jo," Lightning replied with a heavy sigh. "Sha-Lightning doesn't know what happened. It all happened so fast."

Jo broke out laughing but had to settle herself, she had watched it several times in slow motion and it was just as funny each time. "Buck up Protein Puff, it wasn't that bad."

"I sha-lost the game."

"Your team lost the game and believe me, they'd be nothing without you."

"You sha-think?"

"Nope, I'm just saying it," Jo replied sarcastically. "What do you think genius?"

"Thanks Jo."

"Hey if you look stupid, I look stupid. And I can't have that happening."

"I didn't look sha-stupid."

"No one is saying you did. It was just a fumble but you still outshined those losers in the back. Not enough to get awarded or anything but enough that they won't can your ass next game."

"That's because sha-Lightning is the man!"

"Sha-Lightning is a man." Jo corrected. "Anyway, when are you getting back here?"

"You just can't sha-do without me. You're lonely, just admit it."

"Nope. I just want to know how much time I have before I should be putting your stuff out on the sidewalk."

"Haha." Lightning knew what she was like by now. "You just can't sha-mit it. You sha-miss me."

"I don't- ug- I just need a date Lightning."

"I've got three more games, then sha-Lightning will be back when he's MVP."

"You'd better because your trophy case is taking up precious space in this apartment and if you aren't back soon all those trophies are gonna go sha-bam on the pavement below."

"You wouldn't!"

"Probably not, but I wouldn't test it if I were you."

"Lightning sha-won't. Now I've got a post game party to get to. See ya, sha-babe."

"What did I tell you about calling me sha-babe?"

"Don't remember. Gotta go."

"Not to call me- wait. Are you there? Lightning? Lightning? Ugh, fine. The things I put up with from you." Jo hung up the phone, tossed it aside and went to his trophy wall. She wouldn't do anything to it, really, but she liked to keep him on his toes. And he was right, she did miss him, even though he drove her crazy at times... and it wasn't the worst thing in the world dating a pro-footballer either.

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_Ah, we'll always have Joning...  
_

_(they'd better be sitting together come finale)._


	2. Fatties and Such

_A/N; More phone calls from the future of Lightning and Jo's life. Last time it was focused on Lightning's future life, so I decided to make one focused on Jo's *ahem* career. And because skinny Owen would be hilarious to see. I wish they would do a spin off on the future lives of TD contestants and make this happen._

_Summary: Jo calls Lightning to tell him which former TD contestant got seriously fat. Continuation of future-set phone calls between Jo and Lightning.  
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_****__**Future**_ Phone Calls  


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"Sha-Lightning's on the LINE."

"Hey Protein Powder Puff, guess who got fat?"

"Um, I don't know, Jo, who got fat?" said Lightning on the other end of the phone scratching his head. People were always getting fat around Jo weren't they? Because she worked on that tv show 'Canada's Biggest Fatties' as a personal trainer, getting to do what she did best, ripping down people's self esteem in her no-nonsense approach.

It wasn't the first time they had an ex-Total Drama contestant on the show either. Owen was on the show the first year Jo had been hired for it and she whipped him into an unrecognizable shape. The new and improved Owen had really kept the weight off too, which had to be some kind of miracle but Jo knew he just needed the right motivation. They also had that Honey Boo Boo wannabe from the sixth season on the show. Jo got into a huge fight with her, which was great for ratings but it didn't end up doing much for the ex-tv star's weight loss or for Jo's reputation on the show.

"Ale-handsome-dro."

"What? That Latin schmoozer guy?"

"Oh yeah, he got reallllllll fat."

Lightning didn't see how that was possible. Alejandro was one of the fittest guys on Total Drama. He could even make his pecs move just by sheer willpower. But Lightning didn't get how anyone ever got fat, not really. When you were always doing stuff you had no time to get fat, right? "Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure. He's going to be on next season. I've reserved a special dose of punishment just for him," Jo answered unable to keep from smirking. "Apparently Heather dumped him and he went from perfectly toned to fatass in three weeks."

"Wow. Even his ass got fat?"

"Especially his ass, Quarterbrain. He's all ass. He should be called Ale-ASS-dro." She was so using that on camera next season.

"So if he's all ass then how does he eat?"

"I didn't mean literally. Ugh, why do I even tell you things, sha-moron? Anyway, I've got to get back to my squat-thrusts. See you later."

"Sha-see..." but Lightning realized Jo had already hung up on him. Next time he'd have to be faster to hang up on her first. Sha-yeah.

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_It's short but yeah...  
_

_I could see them competing to hang up on each other first becoming a 'thing' with these two._

_Such a functional relationship and all._


	3. Fashion and Jealousy

_A/N; I wanted to put Brick in, because I like teasing me some Jock. And it's funny for Jo to make Lightning jealous on purpose. So yeah, I had this in my head and had to get it out.  
_

_Summary: Lightning calls Jo only to find out that she's been with Brick. Jealous banter ensues. Continuation of future-set phone calls between Jo and Lightning.  
_

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_****__**Future**_ Phone Calls  


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"Hey, what's the deal Jo? Your sha-phone has been off."

"Oh? It has?" said a very out of breath Jo. "Fancy Pants McArthur is in town and I wanted to give him the tear down of his latest 'line' of clothes that I wouldn't even dress a dog in." Brick had finally made it in the fashion world and Jo came in contact with him semi-regularly since he did some work on her show _Canada's Biggest Fatties_ with the wardrobe. Jo didn't let him get near her for wardrobe help. Her style had stayed about the same through the years and she wanted to keep it that way. It was kinda her thing. She needed a gimmick like that to set her apart from the other trainers.

"Huh? Who's fancy?"

"Brick, Lightning. Brick. Remember? Buzz-cut? Wets himself constantly? Answers to 'Pansy'?" Jo rolled her eyes.

"So you've spent the whole sha-afternoon with Brick?"

"Yeah, turns out he's been in Paris with that ditzy blonde Lindsay, remember? She's been his 'model' whatever the heck that means. I asked if they were knocking boots but he thought I meant literal boots - what a doofus!"

"So what have you been doing with that loser? Lightning has been training all day - sha-yeah! I bet that Brick guy isn't as fit as the Lightning!"

"What?" Jo smirked. "Are you jealous Lighting?"

"Sha-no way! I just don't know why you'd be wasting time with him when you could be watching me train."

"I can't believe it! You're jealous! Ha!" Jo shook her head, thoroughly amused. "We went for a run to settle old scores. I beat him fair and square. So he has to do something for me on the show next season. I can't believe you're jealous. Of Brick for Brains of all people! You really think I'd be shacking up with a fashion designer? Someone that makes stylish-but-casual menswear for a living?" He had to be insane to think that! It wasn't that she hated clothes, it's just that her and Brick had completely different priorities in life. And it wasn't that she didn't like bossing guys around but Brick was a little too fragile for her tastes.

"No-yes... I don't know!"

"I thought you were a little more secure in your manhood than that, Lightning. Brick's a friend," even though it had taken her the longest time to actually call him that. "I think he's still too in love with his mommy to actually find someone though." _Cruel?_ She called it as she saw it. "You're my... whatever the heck you are. But whatever it is, it _definitely_ beats friend."

"So the Lightning beats Brick? Sha-booyah!"

"Yeah, sure, make it all about your ego."

"So I'll sha-see you later?"

"Nah, I think I'll stick around Brick a little longer until your head deflates again. We're gonna go grab a bite."

"Wait. You're STILL with Brick?"

"See ya whenever, Lightning." And with a short cackle she hung up the phone. _Why not make him sweat a little?_

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_I'm a little interested in doing a spin off to this where it's not just phone calls but focused on Jo's new TV show job.  
_

_It'd be really cool to have Chris pop up and to see what he got up to after Total Drama got canned. Haha._

_But yeah, I think it'd be nice if Brick and Jo could have jobs where they'd still have to be in contact with each other._


End file.
